Pumping Sucks

Pumping sucks.  Pumping really sucks.  For those moms who want to make sure that they feed their baby the best food for them (i.e. breastmilk), pumping is the way of life.  It is a bitch.  But, I will do it to the end of the earth, because that means that little baby Lily gets the best food for her.  My advice: if you can be a full time mom for the first six months to a year of your little one's life, do it. That, or move to one of the third world countries that have better maternity leave than the U.S. Almost every country in the world has better maternity leave than the U.S.

Let me tell you some of the complicated things I've learned about pumping:

Many women cannot pump colostrum.  It is better hand expressed.  Lily wouldn't latch well for the first three days because of the birth trauma she experienced.  So, I had to hand express everything until she would latch.  The pump couldn't express the colostrum.

It kinda hurts.  I mean, seriously.  Duh.  I would expect it to, but the fact that we spend hours a day and months upon months doing something that hurts is just crazy.

I should have started pumping sooner.  I played with the pumps a little bit, but I didn't really try to pump much until a week before I had to return to work.  Sure, I want to only feed baby girl refrigerated milk (frozen milk kills the antibodies present). But, I had no idea how much I could pump in a day or in that 8 hours I was gone at work.  So, when that first day, I only pumped 5 oz, and that started to decrease as the week went on, I was in a full panic. She was eating 9 oz per day then.  I've done a lot to increase my pumping output, which I'll talk about later.

Pump flanges come in more than one size!  OMG!  Standard is a medium.  You could need a small, large, extra large, or bigger!  And the size corresponds with your nipple/breast, not with your bra size.  So, you just have to try a few out and see what works for you by extracting the most milk.

You should pump for no less than 10 minutes.   Really 15 to 20 if you want to stimulate milk production.

You should also pump for 2 to 5 min after the end of your last let down to stimulate milk production.

Let down can occur immediately or after a few minutes. Sometimes, I am leaking milk before I even start to pump.  Sometimes, it takes a minute or two.

It is not uncommon to have multiple letdowns per session. I have three; one occurs immediately, one at around seven minutes, and one at fourteen minutes. 

I have to pump 7-8 times per day to keep up with baby girl.  Lemme tell you about running around.  I don't feel like I get a break.  Just to keep up with my baby girl, I spend nearly two hours pumping just when I'm at work.  That's not to mention the two additional hours I spend at home.  Even if the baby slept through the night, I'd still have to get up and pump!  I don't have time to go to Starbucks.  If I wasn't just bitching, I couldn't write this blog post this fast.  In fact, it's taken me two months to finish this post!  I can barely go to the bathroom or find something to eat.  Working out?  Forget it, until I stop breastfeeding.  If you see me at work, and it looks like I'm gonna run someone down, just get out of the way.

Forget something or it breaks?  You're probably screwed for a day.  We forgot to pack one of my flanges for a day at work.  I had to try to pump both boobs with one flange in the time it took me to double pump.  I forgot my flanges at work one day, so I had to use a smaller size at home.  Ouch!  Or, my husband was going to have to drive an hour and a half round trip to find them at 9pm at night.  Some gals have ripped membranes or cracked tubing.  I have some extra parts, but if something goes wrong at work, I'm SOL.

More notes on how to increase one's pumping output and/or milk supply soon.

Wonder Weeks

 Some moms on the Baby Center attachment parenting board commented about "wonder weeks" and after looking into it, it sounded like something that would help us through our little ones fussy times. There is a Wonder Weeks book, a Wonder Weeks app, and a Wonder Weeks website.  I downloaded the app and previewed the book on Kindle before deciding to buy.  After getting mega attached to "Super Baby" and then finding that I really disagreed with some of the things it suggested, I'm reluctant to assume that any one person has any answers or believe that any concepts in one person's book is true or will apply to us.  So far, the biggest lessons from "Wonder Weeks" is that little one will be super fussy, cranky, and have mood swings for a few weeks.  She will be more clingy and have some trouble sleeping.  And, this is just a phase, which will also pass.  Oh, and it's nothing that we've done to cause her this distress; this is just a necessary part of growing up.  We recognize these frustrating periods.  This especially when you just want to give this little, precious baby anything she needs, but you can't figure out what she needs.

 developmental periods chart
from the android app

She's going into the period where she learns about events.  This is where she puts together several smooth transitions to become an event.  An event is something like putting something in her mouth, understanding a bouncing ball, or being able to pass something from one hand to another.  This is a precursor to being able to roll over and crawl.

Anyhow, we're just taking it one day at a time, holding her super tight, and excited for the new skills she's developing right before our eyes.  It's amazing how she is about the same size for awhile, and then all of a sudden, she just looks bigger and her clothes are tighter.  It is also amazing how one day she doesn't know what to do with her hands, and then the next day, she's got her thumb in her mouth and she can put her hands together.  Wow!  She holds my hand as she falls asleep, and it's my favorite thing.

Breastfeeding is Hard

Breastfeeding was supposed to be easy, but it was more difficult than giving birth. In the past, we were surrounded by extended families full of women who had breastfed. Now, most of us go it nearly alone. Knowledge that was passed down from generation to generation has been replaced by experts. Thank goodness for groups like Le Leche League who try to preserve the support breastfeeding women used to get in their extended families.

I now understand why so many women give up breastfeeding.  I pushed along, because I knew that breastfeeding my little one breastmilk was the best thing I could do for her to ensure that she has a healthy life.  We are no longer surrounded by breastfeeding women who can help us.  And, the support that we do have can interfere with our intuition by echoing back to us conventional thought processes around how to raise our babies, such as trying to tell us that they are eating too much or to put them on a schedule.  Most of us end up going back to work much sooner than is best for baby, because the U.S. does not have adequate maternity laws.  Breastfeeding in public is seen as taboo.  We compete with conventional doctors who often tell us that we have a low supply and that we need to supplement with formula, because the baby's weight doesn't match a chart.  It's a lot to compete with.

Our Bradley instructor told us to connect with breastfeeding resources before we gave birth, because that would make it more likely that we'd reach out for help when we needed it.  Bradley encourages pregnant women to attend Le Leche League meetings prior to giving birth.  I attended two meetings, which was a blessing, because I knew exactly who to contact when I had a day-old newborn who wouldn't eat. She gave me great advice, connected to me some online resources, and followed up via phone to make sure that I could feed my baby.  I also found support on Babycenter.com's Breastfeeding Support and Pumping Moms forums.  Women are posting and responding to questions during all hours of the day.  Additionally, when I would google my questions to find pages that could shed some light on whatever baby topic I wanted to know about.  I cannot imagine going through this without the internet like previous generations did.

I thought breastfeeding would be easy, because babies have instincts. They come out wanting to find the breast, and they can move and root to do so. But, Lily was suctioned quite a bit, due to a lot of meconium in the womb, and we were separated for a long time, because I lost a lot of blood during labor and delivery. That made the first days of breastfeeding difficult for us both. She would root for the nipple, but cry when she got there. I had to hand express colostrum into a spoon to feed her. At the end of day 3, she was starving, because my colostrum ran out, but my milk hadn't come in. I didn't realize we weren't getting anything, and the continued breastfeeding destroyed my nipples, which took four weeks to heal. We had latch issues and pumping issues as well.

Here are some major lessons that I learned:

• Birth trauma can make it difficult for baby to breastfeed.  Embracing birth as a natural part of life, I didn't think that we were going to have any birth trauma. 
• Have people to call just in case.  I was attending Le Leche League meetings prior to giving birth, because I have trouble asking for help.  It was a life saver.
• Pump flanges come in more than one size!  OMG!  Standard is a medium.  You could need a small, large, extra large, or bigger!  And the size corresponds with your nipple/breast, not with your bra size.  So, you just have to try a few out and see what works for you by extracting the most milk.
• Big-breasted women have challenges breastfeeding.  I watched some videos on Youtube made by some large-breasted women who seemingly also had issues.  I don't think I have big boobs, but my mom begs to differ.
• Babies also need to learn how to breastfeed just like mom does.  I noticed that as we worked at it more and more, baby girl learned how to breastfeed better.  For example, folks kept saying that her lips should flare out a little with a good latch.  No matter how I tried to help her at first she couldn't flare her lips.  

Lily and mama are still working some kinks out, but baby girl is chugging away!